Nikamwambia docta nataka kupima mimba na ukimwi,,,docta akasema karibu,,,kisha akaniuliza ulishawahi kupima HIV hapo nyuma? Nikamwambia hapana ni mara yangu ya kwanza,,,kamanavyojua madaktari maswali yao lakini mwishi wa siku akanipima akaniambia subiri hapo nakuja,,,nikakaa hapo moyo unadundia nnje ya mwili natamani hata niondoke nisisubiri majibu,,nikaanza kujiuliza hivi ilikuaje nikamuamini ghafla na kukubari kukutana nae bila kupima wala kinga yoyote!!! Nilijiuliza na kujutia sanaaa na kujiona mjinga utadhani sikwenda shule vile nilijilaumu sana lakini nikajipa moyo konde acha nione itakavyokua sawa tu....punde doctor aliniita nikaingia akaniambia haya keti hapo nikaketi kisha akaanza uko tayari kupokea majibu yoyote yatakayokuja? Nipo tayari doctor, natetemeka mpaka doctor alijua maana nilikua situliii,,,akaniuliza una mpenzi? Nikajibu ninae,,mna mda gani toka mmekutana na yupo wapi? Aisee alikua ananichanganya basi tu, nikamjibu nikamwambi tuna mwezi na zaidi toka tumekutana na yupo dar esaalam haishi hapa...akasema sawa..majibu yako si mabaya ni mazuri tu HIV hauna ila unaujauzito,,,,uwiiii nilitamani nijifukie doctor nina ujauzito??? Akajibu ndio na hongera kwa hilo...niliishiwa pozi...akaendelea kusema unatakiwa urudi kupima HIV baada ya miezi mitatu nikaitikia sawa doctor nashukuru...nilitoka nikiwa na furaha sina maambukizi ila mimba ilinivuruga nikawaza yule mmama nitamweleza nini na mbaya zaidi mwanaume hapatikani nimekoma mimi kilichonituma,,,nilifika hostel sina nguvu nikajitupa kitandani mara mkurugenzi akanipigia akasema uko wapi mrembo wangu,,nikamwambia nipo hostel akasema baadae nahitaji kukuona,, woiii angejua nilivyovurugwa nikamjibu najisikia kuumwa dear naomba tuonane kesho...akajibu nahitaji kuonana na ww leo jikaze utoke hivyohivyo...mmh nikasema sawa ntakuja, akasema jiandae ntakupitia hapo nikifika ntakupigia utoke,, nikajibu sawa....akakata simu,,,nikajaribu kumtafuta sylivester bado alikua hapatikani na mdogo wake hivyohivyo nikawaza niende dar lakini moyo ukawa unasita,,,hapo hatuna siku nyingi tunaenda likizo...nikaoana ngoja nijiandae nikamsikilize huyu mzee anataka nini maana nilijua mapenzi siwezi kumpa hata iweje maana ni mwathirika na wake zake aliokua anaishi nao hawakai muda utasikia wamefariki ghafla...nikajiandaa nikachukua pedi nikavaa,,,na punde alinipigia nitoke nnje,, nikatoka kinyonge sanaa nikaingia kwenye gari akawasha safari ikaanza,,,hapo hajaniambia tunaenda wapi na hajaniongelesha tangu nimeingia kwenye gari ikabidi nimuulize, dear tunaenda wapi? Akaniambia kwani una hofu? Kua na amani utapajua tu,, mmmh nikawa mpole,hapo nina yangu yanayonivuruga...moja kwa moja hadi dodoma hoteli 😳😳😳 nikasema leo vimeumana,,,akapaki gari tukashuka akanishika mkono alijua sijui ntakimbia tukafika hadi mapokezi akalipia chumba akapewa funguo tukaanza kuelekeea kwenye hicho chumba hapo nawaza hatari amani imetoweka ila nikajisemea moyoni huwezi nifanya chochote...tukafika chumbani akafunga mlango akanikalisha kitandani akaniambia mrembo wangu leo ni siku yetu nataka tule, tunywe tuenjoy hapa hostel unarudi keshoo,,,😳😳 nikamwambia mpenzi mimi leo sijisikii vizuri akasema usijali kwani nimekwambia ufanye kazi si tunapumzika tu nikawa mpole maana nilitaitiwa alikua ameoda chakula kikafika na vinywaji tukaanza kula nakula ili mradi tu hata ham sikua nayo nilitamank wine aliyoagiza ila nikajizuia nilijua nikinywa tu nikilewa atanikula huyu mmbwa...nikamwambia mimi situmii wine niagizie juice...akanilazimasha lakini nilikata katakata,,,akaniagizia juice hapo ni mida ya saa moja usiku, tulivyomaliza kula akaingia bafuni akajimwagia maji kisha akaniambia nami niende nikamwambia hapana ntaoga baadae nimeoga sasa hivi nilivyotoka hostel,,basi akapanda kitandani akanisogeza niwe karibu yake hapo nasali sala zote jamani acheni tuu....akaanza kunishikashika mimi namtoa, ananishika namtoa,,akaniuliza kwa ukali kwanini unanifanyia hivyo ni muda gani sasa kila siku unanizungusha au unacheza na akili yangu...nikamwambia hapana ni vile tu leo siko vizuri..akasema kila siku haupo vizuri leo nataka moja tu basi na tutafanya polepole...nikamwambia naomba nielewe,,,kwani alinielewa saa ngapi asianze kunivua nguo tukaanza kuvutana,,,ananivua mi namzuia tulivutana akashikwa na hasira akanipiga kibao woiii nikapandisha mashetani nikaanza kupiga kelele kama mwehu lakini haikusaidia maana hoteli mnazijua kusikia ni kazi maana vioo ni tinted,,,,nikaona huyu leo kadhamiria kunipa vidudu vyake hapo wine ishamuingia akilini utamwambia nini,, akawa anaendelea kunilazimisha sa ngapi nisijitupe chini nikaanza kutetemeka kama nataka kukata roho weee pombe ilimuisha akavaa harakaharaka akapiga mapokezi kuomba msaada,,,namchora tu lakini sikuacha kujifanyisha,,,wahudumu walifika nikabebwa hadi ground (chini) wakaniingiza kwenye gari hapo najifanya nimezimia,,,akawasha gari mbio dispendary,,,
ITAENDELEA.........
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